Art and Motherhood

Professional Artist Mom - Is it a Myth or Can It Be Done?

My daughter, stuck in the car while I paint a nocturne.

Laura Alma-Tadema.  Rosa Bonheur.  Georgia O’Keeffe.  Frida Kahlo.  Mary Cassatt.  Cecelia Beaux.  Anna Hyatt Huntington.  Joan Mitchell.  

More than likely, you have heard many of those names.  What do they all have in common?  They are all female artists of the last 150 years who reached the highest echelons of artistic acclaim.  And none of them had children.

There is a commonly-held belief within the art community that to be a serious artist, one must devote oneself entirely to that pursuit.  Art can be an all-consuming profession – more of a calling than a job.  It can be difficult to maintain a relationship or a marriage when one is absorbed by the artistic impulse, not to mention raising children.  It is not an accident that there are many more men at the top levels of artistic success than there are women, and it has nothing to do with talent or commitment.  Many women put aside art (or other careers) to raise their children.  In the process, they lose ground and visibility in the art world (of course, there are men who fall into this category as well).  And while family roles have converged quite a bit in the 21^st Century, women still tend to be the primary caregivers in a home (See this graphic from the Pew Research Center which summarizes this trend: http://assets.pewresearch.org/wp-content/uploads/sites/12/201/06/FT_16.06.14_fathersDay_time_use.png). 

If that’s true, then am I being a dreamer to try to meet the demands of a professional art career while raising a daughter?  I don’t think I am.

Pursuing any career while raising children is a challenging undertaking.  Children require a lot of attention, love, guidance, and patience.  They get sick and share their germs.  They get hurt, grumpy, uncooperative.  They have temper tantrums and make big messes.  They need their noses blown, their diapers changed, their knees bandaged, their dinners made.  They need rides to and from their after-school activities, help with homework, fears reassured.  Whenever my schedule is the most tight, the least flexible, it is inevitable that there will be a missed bus, a sudden fever, or a sleepless night.  When things are running smoothly, there are still so many moving parts to our schedules that often, there is no chance I can get in the studio.  When I do get in the studio, it is often only for a few hours, and all the stopping and starting can make a painting take extra time to finish.  Oh yeah – and kids are EXPENSIVE.

But the flip side is this:

Inspecting a big Glover's silkmoth in the back yard.

Things we take for granted as adults are astonishing for children.  Spending time with my daughter is a chance to see the world anew.  Taking the same walk day after day can result in a continuous source of discovery and delight.  We get down on the ground and look under bushes and beneath rocks at a bug’s eye view.  We climb up cliffs and imagine we can fly.  We go dragon hunting and pet caterpillars, skip stones and sing to each other.

Children are inspiring in their level of curiosity and their capacity for creative thinking.  We as adults can get stuck in "the box," but kids don't even know there is a box.  Anything is possible in their minds when they are small.  Later, the magical thinking fades a bit, but the creativity comes out in lots of  other ways.  I have found it remarkable and surprising to watch how my daughter's uniqueness matures and changes as she grows.  

As the child of an artist, she is growing up immersed in the arts.  She’s been in galleries and museums since she was born.  She started coming to Galleries West with me when she was 8 weeks old (thanks to my beloved friends Bill & Debbie Bunch and Scott Nickell, who owned the gallery and who became like a second family for my daughter).  At the age of three, she was noticing the paintings on the walls of houses in television ads!  Here she is in Galleries West in front of one of my old still life paintings – she used to kiss the flowers through the glass:

How do babies' legs bend like that??

I get to share my passion for art in such a personal way.  Not all artists’ children are enthusiastic about making art themselves, but my daughter has relished drawing (and more recently, painting) since she was a tiny person.  We talk constantly about light, value, shadow, edges, color.  I love to hear her aesthetic observations, and it’s a special delight to watch her develop her own passions. Painting in plein air with her is extra fun.

I am inspired by my daughter in the visual sense, as well.  She has found herself the subject of drawings and paintings over the years, and I am certain there will be many more.

There are other ways I benefit directly.  I have a built in sidekick for art events, a great helper in the gallery and studio, and she has a fantastic eye for critiques.  She even likes to help carry gear when we paint outside!

L to R: A tiny sherpa, the 'red carpet' at the NMWA Western Visions show last year, mopping up at Trio.

A couple words of advice for any other young artists thinking about taking this path.  If you decide to be a career artist and a parent, accept that your productivity may be sporadic, but your inspiration will increase!  Accept that you will need help - from a spouse, a friend, family, or babysitters.  I know I couldn't meet many of my deadlines without my husband being able to take over the childcare on some weekends or picking up our daughter after swim practice when I'm finishing up a commission.  Accept that some deadlines will just not be achievable - but remember there will always be more!  And embrace the distractions.  It's only a brief time that I get to be this involved in my daughter's life, and it is such a wonderful experience.  I choose to look at this time of my life not as a sacrifice but as a choice (and I remind myself of that choice when things get really hectic).  Getting to be a mom and an artist is a great adventure, and I would never choose another path.

-Jennifer L. Hoffman
  Behind the Brushes, October 2016
  www.triofineart.com